Give Out Specific Jobs!
One of the hardest things while planning a wedding can be determining how to actually include everyone that wants to be involved. Though a daunting task in some regards here are some helpful tips that will hopefully allow you to keep those with the best intentions under wraps.
Family
Family members can be the hardest to control. They are the ones that feel a right to be involved and execute your wedding plans. Make sure upfront that both of you (together) meet with your parents to layout your expectations for the event. It will be a lot easier in the future for you to refer to this conversation if someone starts to get out of line. This conversation will also allow your parents to be the ambassadors to the rest of the family to relay your desires and expectations for the event.
If you still have individuals that have expressed an extreme desire to be involved provide them with a task that will ultimately make them feel important but might not affect your vision. Have them come over one afternoon and help stuff invitations or party favors. It will provide them with the bonding experience they are looking for and you with one less thing to worry about. However, if they have creativity in a specific area, use their talents to your behalf. It might just save you some money in the long run.
Friends
Friends are normally pretty easy to control, they just want to come and enjoy the party, but in some cases you might have friends that you were unable to include in your wedding party but still want to be involved. Be sure to include those individuals in other activities or give them a specific task at the wedding that still makes them feel special like reading at the ceremony, singing, or if they love to dance and be the life of the party be sure to tell them you sat them next to the dance floor to keep the party going when you have to be busy doing "bride" things. However, be cautious of those friends that just want to help plan to get all the glory. Ultimately they are just going to get in the way of your vision.
The Wedding Party
The women and men that make up your wedding party can sometimes be just as bad as the overbearing mother. They somehow feel that once they are in the wedding party they have a say in planning the major elements of your event. Be sure to choose these individuals wisely because they can quickly become a major distraction. Always include them in things like gown fittings and dress shopping. Meet with them to have lunch or drinks when you can so they always feel like they know what is going on but ultimately make sure they understand their role and expectations upfront. If they do, most of them will be mindful that it is your day.
No matter whom you include in your planning be sure to remember at all times that this is your wedding and it really is ok to say no. Don't let others take over the vision and idea that you have come up with to just appease them. They aren't the ones getting married, you are!
Michelle M. Mirzoian is President & CEO of M Squared Events, where she and her team of event specialists and designers have planned over 100 events both big and small. Located out of Royal Oak, Michigan, M Squared is a boutique event-consulting firm that strives to provide their clients with excellent customer service, extreme attention to detail and amazing creativity for social, corporate and non-profit events. To contact M Squared Events please call (248) 721-4422 or info@msquaredevents.com.
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